Thursday, September 26, 2013


VERY IMPORTANT: Press play on the video before reading this rant. The soundtrack just adds to it...and I write like I talk, so be ready to replay the song halfway through lol  
Click here for the soundtrack for this read....

So here's the deal. I've reached my breaking point today. I have always been one of those people who feed off of the energy around me, gaining joy and fulfillment from the positive aura of those people and situations close-by. Unfortunately, that also means that the same thing happens with negativity. And that's what has brought about this collection of thoughts I want to share....

I can't deal with this negativity anymore. It is totally taking over my every breath and it has to stop. As many have noticed, I've pulled away from a lot of interaction via text, Facebook, emails, etc and it is simply because I need a few moments to recharge. What happened to the love?

I'm so tired of seeing people cut others down, spread vicious rumors, act like kids.... we are all humans and have the right and choice to behave how we choose, but it's disheartening to witness people making the choice to breed and feed negativity instead of fostering love and hope. 

Stop cutting people down for being who they are. They don't dress the same as you? Don't love the same as you? Don't fit your mold of what sexy, fit, successful, and lovely is? Too bad. We weren't all made to be the same person. Variety is the spice of life and if this was a Thai restaurant, I'd ask for a heat index of 10 because different is beautiful and loving your fellow human beings regardless of how they look, dress, love, or believe? That's hot.

You see people fighting for a cause? Help the fight, don't be a voice of doubt. I'm thinking specifically of those nay-sayers getting on me for my constant posts about the upcoming AIDS Walk. To you, I say, "Get over it." This is a passion of mine, it is something I live, sleep, and breathe daily. Is it hurting anyone? Not that I'm aware of. Is it annoying sometimes? Uhhhh yuh! But it's not nearly as annoying as the hundreds of posts I see daily about another D-list celeb shaving her head because she's cracked out, people dramatically whining and crying about not being able to find that perfect mate, or individuals just trying to drum up drama with those who will read their posts. I truly cannot understand how so many people have turned a blind eye to my posts, begging and pleading, not for money and walkers, but just for support and love for those of us asking for it. And it's not the case just for this AIDS Walk, but for so many things. Maybe we can't all give money, but love and support are free....and often times more valuable than any monetary donation you can find. Love and support... that's what a community is about.

And it isn't just on an individual level. So many agencies, establishments, and community organizations were created to foster this idea of communal love and support. Yet, as of late, those very same labels are the ones at the forefront of childish drama, despicable behavior, and falling guilty of not building a community, but tearing it apart. On behalf of those suffering, please think about the bigger picture. It isn't about who can get more Facebook posts in, who's events are swamped and who's are empty, or which agency will be the most popular. The real goal should be to build a community - instead of breeding and feeding negativity, foster love and support instead. I can guarantee it is what we need as a community. Even still, there is one more aspect of love and support that is missing... and it comes from within. 

We can't truly love and support our friends or our communities until we first love and support ourselves. Society says you are ugly? Society says you are worth nothing? Society says you have nothing to contribute? Who cares... What do YOU think? True love and support has to start inside ourselves first. We can't survive off the positivity of others. We must reciprocate, in some way or another, the positive energy that we use daily to thrive. If we are all takers, the supply will run low and we will be left wallowing in rotting, useless, draining negativity. I for one, can't do that. 

I'm taking this moment, right here and right now, to stand up for love. Granted, I'm going to fall sometimes and not be quite as loving and supportive as I should be, but I'm going to try. That's what I am asking of you.... please try. 

Without love we are nothing. Without trying we are doomed.

All my love and support,

Saturday, April 21, 2012

And the word is... Patio

Just a thought I wanted to share.... I know there isn't a thumbnail currently, but the video IS there!

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

And the word is... Nosey

Here's my question...

Why is people so frikkin' nosey?? 

I must admit, this is a blog that could really hold a lot, could be very important and applicable to many, yet, I am writing this to just one person...... the chick sitting beside me in Cognition class. (If you just got nervous it was about you, we need to talk). Yeah... that means you, girl with the Sony memo recorder, greasy hair, and balloon-esk windbreaker, sitting beside me reading my emails!! Are your glasses just that dirty that you think you are looking at your computer screen, not mine?? If so, here, take my hanky. If not, then I hope you keep looking at my screen and read this blog before it is even posted!

Yyyyyyyyeah, that's right. I am talking to you, muchacha. I'm on to you like the stain right there on your jeans. Op! Made you look, didn't I? Why? Because you are looking at MY computer screen... nachos! (Not yours? Get it?)


I seriously think I lack a filter today. Why? Because I may be blogging because of this chick, but the truth is, if I were to blog for every time I've said something like this aloud today, I'd have... like... a lot of posts.

Earlier today, I actually asked a girl as we passed each other why she was talking so loudly. Seriously. She was in her conversation with some little sorority girls and as we passed she says (obviously not to me), "blah blah blah blah. And, like, you know what I wanna know?" My unsolicited response? "Why you have to talk so loud?" Did she hear me? I don't know. Did she hear me? I don't care.

So, there are just two examples of today's lack of filter. Alas, let us not forget the true purpose of this here blog o' mine... STOP BEING NOSEY!

You can be curious. You can wonder. You can ask. But please, for the love of all things of a celestial origin, stop looking at my frisking computer screen while I read my emails! If you need to read them, I will be glad to forward them on to you. However, if you look over my shoulder and read my emails that do not concern you, I will simply blog about you, your nasty, unwashed hair, your outdated book bag, and your pretty pink little flash drive.

We all have noses, but we don't all have to be nosey....

Sunday, March 25, 2012

And the word is... Revived!

Okay people,

Sit back and get ready for a scolding! How is it that it has been almost nine freaking months since I have posted!?!?! And do you know who is at fault? You. That's right. You. Don't ask me how or why, because I haven't figured out a reason yet. That's right, I am making a statement based on no concrete evidence or support. Yet, it is fact. It is your fault.

Nine months?? That's like as long as a firkin pregnancy people! Oh wait... I see something good here. Oh yes... the analogies are coming back to me. The metaphors are flooding back! Come to papa!

Okay... so let's put a creative spin on this shall we? Ok so what takes nine months to develop? Oh come one.... think. You've got nine months.... then you have... A BABY!!!! Duuuuuh!

Ok... so it's been nine months of development and growth for me and now that those nine months are up, I am rebirthing myself into the blogging world a new being. How have I changed? What developments have taken place? Well, if you want to know, you'll just have to stick around... because that's exactly what I am doing. I am sticking around!!

Here's to the rebirth of a blog and, more importantly, the rebirth of an impassioned spirit!

Monday, July 4, 2011

And the word is... Blank

DISCLAIMER: I wrote this blog forever ago and apparently never hit the "publish" button. It isn't exactly applicable now, but if I took the time to type it out, I should still post it... even if it is almost a year later.

UGH!!!! I hate when this happens. My mind just goes blank on what to blog. Blogger's Blank Syndrome.

I mean, there is so much to talk about, but really nothing to talk about. You know? I think part of it is that I am so busy these days.

Take tomorrow, for example. I have an Abnormal Psych exam at 9:30am. Happy, Happy. Joy, Joy. It only covers Chapters 1-4, which isn't bad at all.... unless your financial aide check never showed up, meaning you didn't get the book until last week. That means I have to read four chapters, watch two movies, and review my notes from every class period tonight. Can I get some positive, please? OH! I take really great notes! :D

Well, after that exam, I have 15 minutes to make it to my Social Psych class. Wonderful class. No, I am not bing sarcastic this time! I love Social Psych. It's even better when your proffessor is a tall, lanky Japanese man who fills his slideshows with pictures of fat, latino-ish frat guys drinking beer in a hot tub. I really love the class so far. It really integrates sociology and psychology.. the two subjects I like best.

When that class ends, I have a couple of hours to finish cramming for my second exam of the day: Psych Data and Analysis 1. That would be Psychology 3005.... also known as a fancy way to trick people into taking statistics. EGH! It's called "Research Data and Analysis", but should just be called "UGH" for short. I hate that class and even after a study group last night, I have my doubts about this exam.

At least after the exam I am free! Well... then I have to start looking for sources about my debate next week. I am arguing that 'Cohabitation does NOT reduces the odds of a person's future marital status.' Which, now that I look at this again, it makes no sense. How can it reduce the odds of a future marital status. A marital status simply means "single" "married" etc etc. How can something reduce that? It cannot because we are all destined to have one label or another. Hm... just one more tricky, slippery question from a biased and close-minded professor basing our grades on his opinions. Hmmm.. I think I feel a rant blog coming up soon.

Wow! looky there! I started with no blog and ended... exactly the same.

And the word is... Groupthink

DISCLAIMER: Apparently I composed this blog in May and never quite finished... Oh well. Here's what I had done and never posted:

Somehow, even after we learned in Social Psych that groups were not always beneficial, me and my study buddies decided to get together to study for our Final exam [which went swimmingly]. Well, we started out with the best of intenetions, but... well, let's just say we bonded more than studied.

Also, since you all know I love photography and I haven't shared any of my work in quite some time, I thought you may be interested. Here are a few snapshots of what was supposed to be a Social Psych study session, but turned into a studyshoot....

By far nothing stellar and they are all a little more processed than my usual, but how can you complain when you're using a Blackberry to shoot?

I think this pic is going to reappear soon in a future blog...

And the word is... cycle

Not a unicycle, bicycle, tricycle, motorcycle, life cycle, or popcycle [yes- I am aware that is not the way we spell that, just humor me, okay?]. Nope. I'm talking menstrual cycle. Now before you gag, throw up, run away, and/or block my blog, you should know I don't plan on talking about it foreal... so chill out.

No. The topic of this short, scattered plot of thought is more "male menstruation". "What? Men don't go through that," you say? I'm calling "bull" on that one. Why? Because that's the whole reason you are reading this thing. Granted, men don't go through the same things that women do [oh thank you, Lawd!], no doubt, but we do PMS.... again no doubt.

Like I said, I am not claiming men understand what women go through. [Gosh... do you see how scared I am some chick is going to blow up on me???] All I know is this: Just before I went to bed last night, I felt it coming on. This morning, I woke up, not happy it was July 4th, not happy to have a Monday off work, not happy the sun was out, and not happy for the events of the day which included a cookout and fireworks. Nope. I woke up irritable, upset, and impatient, just to name a few things. Things only got worse after the cookout was cut short because of stuff happening, and now as I write this, I do so to the sound of pouring rain, crashing thunder, and the strobes of lightning. Joy. Anyway, in addition to my not-so-me mood, I can barely think about eating because I have no appetite... and I'm not kidding, feel a bit bloated? Yet, I find that I have now eaten and entire bag of Skittles. If anything should work, it would be that! Nothing. So you think I am overreacting? That this isn't real? Well, if it isn't real, then it isn't real on multiple occassions. It may not happen to most guys on the regular or at regular intervals [although for me it is pretty dern close. Too much? Yeah, proabably. Sorry about that], but it is still PMSing. The mood swings, irritability, no appetite... it has got to be those three little letters: P, M, and S.

Say what you will, believe what you may, and crack all the jokes you want because we are all entitled, but just know the truth: guys PMS too. Period.

Monday, June 27, 2011

And the word is... entourage

So this entry is short and sweet, but absolutely necessary. Why? Because it has been like frikkin forever since I have blogged!! I miss you guys and can't believe I've fallen so behind! Y'all gotta keep me on track! Sheesh!

So tonight at dinner, we were all given a random question. Mine was this: "If you could have a celebrity entourage of three celebrities, who would they be?" So here we go... in no particular order, my tri-entourage would consist of:

Michael Buble
So he may not be the most famous or attractive musician out there, but boy got some pipes! I think I could seriously listen to Michael Buble sing for ages. As much as I hate being exploited as of late to be people's personal siren, I will absolutely admit to being a hypocrite and say how much I would love for Michael to be waiting for me, after a long hard day, just to sing for me. Seriously. Sing to me as I cook, while I eat, while I bathe (but from outside the frikkin door, ya frikkin nasty!), while I drift to sleep, then start up again first thing as I wake up. Yeah? Yeah. So that's Ellioentourage Member 1.

Lady Gaga

So I really hate to stack my entourage with another musician, but c'mon! It's frikkin Lady Gaga! Plus, she is so much more than a musician. Please, don't get me started on her! You know what I am talking about. With her in my entourage, I would never be looking for something different to wear because I could literally wear anything. I would never have to do my hair because homegurl got so wigs! She knows how to party and have a good time, no matter where she is or who she's with. She can make a scene for sure...

The Queen

Now, when Mother Monster makes a little too much of a scene, we'll need a proper ol' bat to reel us back in. That's where the Queen of England comes in. Seriously, can you think of a more proper woman in the world? Need to know which fork to use? She got you. Need a fleet of fur hat-wearing, red-jacketed guards? She got you. Need a royal title in front of your name? She got you. Need a few jewels to sparkle up that look? Guuurrrrrrlll!! Do you not see that picture up there?? She DEFINITELY got you!

So there you have it. My Celebrity Entourage. You know you're jealous. Oh... what? You think you have a better one? Prove it. Show me what you got....

Saturday, June 4, 2011

And the word is... Blegh

Let me talk to you a minute... or two... or more.

So I get back to Chesapeake around 3:30 on Thursday afternoon, and decide to run in Ross just to see if I would like it as much as I used to. Well, it sucked. And I had to report some punks stealing pants, which really ticked me off. After I was done, I took me almost an hour to get home. For anyone who isn't me and wouldn't know, the trip from this particular Ross back to my parents house should take 10-15 minutes. Thanks, Hampton Roads traffic.

I finally get home and immediately start working on yard sale stuff. It took me almost 5 hours of sorting and going through boxes of donations before I could finally walk in my room. I don't even have a bed! Why? Because I have all of my things I just moved back from Cville plus half a room of boxes, floor to ceiling, for my yard sale. Well after all of that, I was dead tired. Talked to Mom for a bit and then conked out on the tiny, little loveseat in the living room.

Fast forward to 2am. I wake up to Mom watching Millionaire and I'm just so cranky and starved. So what to do? Eat rocky road ice cream. Seriously, a huge bowl. I fall back asleep and proceed to have terrible dreams. I won't go into too much detail since this is more so a rant of random happenings over the past day or two. So interesting I know. Anyways, these dreams had to do with, like, every single person that means anything to me, betraying me, lying to me, hurting me, or talking smack. I woke up at 8am in the worst mood in a long, long time.

I then proceed to obtain a credit report. Well, attempt to do so. I try the first service, and they say my information doesn't match so I will have to send an application via snail mail. Sorry, but future landlady needs it this weekend. So I try the next service only to find out they don't offer online results. Third time is the charm, right? Well as I begin to put in my info, the Mac starts to die. Frantically, I'm searching the house all over for the charger. It was nowhere to be found, so I try to hurry through... only to have the computer die as soon as I complete the form. So then I have to pull out my laptop, turn it on, and wait seventeen and half years for it to boot up. Get on, fill out the jank, and finish.... with an actual credit report! Hallelujah! Now off to print!

Then I get to the printer, full of joy, only to realize I don't have to software to connect my computer and the printer. No big deal, I hear you can go online and download the stuff! So, what to do? I get online, find the stuff, and go to upload it, only to have it lock up my computer. Yay. Time to reboot. After my computer restarts, I finally print my report... until the printer runs out of frikkin paper!!! I am not kidding. I was getting SO tired of it. Then, as I celebrate my completed, printed credit report, I glance down and notice it is 11:40am. Awesome I think. Nope! Because then I realize that I have a dentist appointment at 12:15... somewhere that is about 20-25 minutes away (if one is driving the speed limit). No big deal except... I'm still in pajamas, haven't brushed my teeth, hadn't eaten anything... nothing. Straight out of bed and totally grumpy.

I jump in the shower, do what I gotta do, and get out. I run to my truck, speed awa...err... I mean responsibly drive toward the dentist office and just as I get to the exWHAAACK! A frikkin rock smashes into my windshield. It seriously looks like I was shot at. I have a nice, half-dollar size chunk taken out of my windshield. Glorious. On the plus side, I have no cavities... oh, but wait. Apparently, I grind my teeth and therefore have jagged front teeth, flat canines, and flat molars. Great, huh?

I did get to spend 4 hours at Starbucks with my BFF2 and then came home to get down again, then up when my sister and her family came in from Michigan for this crazy family reunion this weekend.

I think it boils down to this: I miss Charlottesville, my special people there, my independence, and my responsibility. Just as I begin to get close to people in Cville, I have to leave for the summer. Bleh. Being back home is nice, but I like being on my own. And the biggest thing, I can't take doing nothing. It's nice for a few days, maybe a week or two, but this is crazy... it drive me crazy. So, I am looking forward to a job this summer back in Cville, making some money -because I also realized this week I have...none? - and getting my own place.

Here's to hoping I get over this bad day[s] thing. In the meantime: